Parenting kids is challenging—especially when you want them to stand firm in their faith in a world full of confusion and pressure. But guiding them doesn’t mean controlling every decision or striving for “perfect parenting.” In this episode, part two of our discussion with Alicia Bennett from Mobilizer Mom, we walk you through practical ways to guide your teen’s faith, create space for honest questions, and nurture resilient, Christ-centered young people who truly own their beliefs. She shares her own journey from feeling overwhelmed and stuck to discovering joy and freedom in parenting through Christ.
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Episode 35: Summary & Transcript
Disclaimer: Please note that this is an automatically generated transcript. Although the transcription is largely accurate, it may be incomplete or inaccurate in some cases due to inaudible passages or transcription errors.
Episode Summary
This episode is the second part of a conversation with Alicia Bennett of Mobilizer Mom. The discussion focuses on the practical application of raising children with a resilient, biblical faith. Alicia shares a detailed example of how her family uses the Olympics to create natural, engaging spiritual conversations about the world, geography, and faith. She also discusses her personal journey of overcoming the feeling of being ill-equipped as a parent by researching and developing intentional strategies with her husband, such as a “learn before they leave” plan for their teenagers. The conversation explores the root of parental fears, often tied to finding identity in one’s children, and concludes with Alicia emphasizing the critical importance of adopting a long-term perspective in parenting to inform daily decisions and interactions.
Episode Transcript
Janel Greig (00:00):
Well, welcome back to Upside Down Parenting. This is our second part of our conversation about raising Daniels and Esthers, faith that lasts beyond your control, with Alicia Bennett from Mobilizer Mom.
In our last episode, we talked about the big picture, why raising kids with a biblical worldview matters so deeply in today’s culture. Today we’re picking up right where we left off focusing on the practical side, what it actually looks like to form resilient faith in our children through everyday life. Let’s jump back into the conversation.
Dr. Matt Jones (00:30):
Okay. So you shared the story of doing a family devotional around the Winter Olympics, and I’ve enjoyed watching the Winter Olympics. And it’s cool how natural that was as just a part of life. Walk us into that moment and what were you watching? What prompted you to turn it into a spiritual conversation? How did that go?
Alicia Bennett (00:51):
Yeah. Well, that comes back a little bit to just my passion for international travel. I’ve lived overseas. I worked with a missions organization, so I kind of had all that knowledge in my head. And so it really got birthed out of a season where I was like, I’ve got all these kids at home. In fact, I was even nannying a couple kids that summer.
It all started in 2016 with Rio de Janeiro. And we were like, “Let’s just have a little fun around this.” So we would travel the world that summer, and we would stop every couple of days in a new country and we would just learn about the country. There’s so many great resources out there. We have the Windows into the World, the kids edition of Operation World. We’ve got maps and globes. And then it’s so easy to find recipes and games and things online. What game do kids play in Germany?
(01:42):
What food do kids eat in China? And so we just kind of started having a lot of fun around it. And then we just love, love, love the Olympic opening ceremony. I feel like it’s just a picture of Revelations five where all the peoples of the world are gathered. Of course, they’re gathered to compete, but we’re talking revelations like they’re gathered to worship the lamb on that last day. And so I just love that. And so we have made bingo games out of it to engage younger kids.
But really it’s like we pull atlases and we’re looking up, okay, how many people are in that country? Do you even know where it is? It totally depends on the age of the kids. You could just have the little ones just, let’s find out where that is on the map. And the older kids are going, well, look at the geography with skiing or sorry, with the winter Olympics, it’s like, do they even have snow in this country?
(02:41):
How many people know Jesus in this country? And then just kind of conversations just spiral from there. So it’s just been a really fun way, a really fun way. I remember watching the Olympics a ton as a kid and we’re not a huge screen time. We are not a family that has the TV on all the time, but during the Olympics, it is on all day.
Janel Greig (03:04):
I love that. Yeah. Alicia, I love that you seem to be a natural teacher with natural giftings. And I think that’s sometimes for us, especially moms when we’re busy, dads when we’re busy, if that’s not a natural inclination, it’s, where do I even get this information? Your ideas are fantastic.
But I think we can point people to your website as a starting point for some of those resources too. So we’ll be sure to link that in the podcast notes. But I love that you took something. And again, there’s intentionality there, but something that seems so simple, but the natural rhythm of life and use that to help equip your kids both with an understanding of what’s going on in the world, but also from a biblical lens. So that’s awesome.
All right. We’re going to move to a segment of the show that we call our speed round, Alicia. And this is a little bit lighter. So this is so that we can get to know you a little bit and our listeners can get to know you fun facts. The only rule…
Dr. Matt Jones (03:57):
And additional motivation to go check out mobilizermom.com, right?
Janel Greig (04:01):
Absolutely.
Dr. Matt Jones (04:01):
Yeah. We get some really good answers here, Alicia.
Janel Greig (04:04):
This is the fun part.
Dr. Matt Jones (04:06):
Yeah, there you go.
Janel Greig (04:07):
The only rule for this, Alicia, is quick answers, no long explanation. So speed round. Ready?
Alicia Bennett (04:13):
Okay, I’ll try.
Janel Greig (04:15):
Okay. Coffee or tea?
Alicia Bennett (04:17):
Tea, if anything. Water mostly.
Janel Greig (04:21):
Okay, good. Early.
Dr. Matt Jones (04:22):
You’ve got to have it in Colorado, Janel. You’ve got to have it in Colorado.
Janel Greig (04:25):
Dehydration, right?
Dr. Matt Jones (04:26):
There you go. Yeah. They say hydrate or die-drate out here.
Janel Greig (04:31):
Early bird or night owl?
Alicia Bennett (04:33):
Oh, I’m an early bird for sure.
Janel Greig (04:35):
So those late night questions can sometimes be like, okay, that’s helpful that husband’s there. Yeah.
Dr. Matt Jones (04:40):
Have you ever fallen asleep answering one of them?
Alicia Bennett (04:43):
Oh, gosh. No.
Dr. Matt Jones (04:45):
No. Okay. No.
Alicia Bennett (04:46):
I can stay up late. It’s just usually I go through, right around nine o’clock. If I don’t hit the bed, then I’m up too late. You know what I mean?
Dr. Matt Jones (04:53):
Okay.
Janel Greig (04:54):
All right. I’m with you. Yep. Favorite movie, Alicia?
Alicia Bennett (04:58):
Oh, like, personally? Favorite movie?
Janel Greig (05:00):
Yeah. Yeah.
Alicia Bennett (05:01):
Oh gosh. I mean, I’ve really loved watching the Lord of the Ring series lately.
Janel Greig (05:10):
Oh wow. Great answer.
Alicia Bennett (05:10):
We watched that with the teens this winter.
Janel Greig (05:13):
Yeah. Awesome. One talent that you wish you had?
Alicia Bennett (05:19):
One talent I wish I had. Oh, I don’t know. I guess I wish I had stuck with playing an instrument longer. So I learned the piano, but I never really stuck with it, and I wish I had.
Dr. Matt Jones (05:35):
Here’s a follow-up. All right. One talent you wish you had that you could have done in the Olympics?
Alicia Bennett (05:41):
Oh, well. So I was a swimmer, so I love watching the swimming and I wish I was talented enough to have gone to the Olympics.
Janel Greig (05:53):
That’s cool. That’s cool. Who is one of your favorite theologians or Christian thinkers?
Alicia Bennett (06:01):
Yeah. I’m blanking on the name right now. Oh my gosh. I can picture him from Bethel Church.
Dr. Matt Jones (06:12):
John Piper?
Alicia Bennett (06:13):
Yes, John Piper. Okay.
Janel Greig (06:16):
Yeah, good. And then this one, close this one out. One small thing that brings you joy every day?
Alicia Bennett (06:23):
My dog.
Janel Greig (06:25):
What kind of dog?
Alicia Bennett (06:26):
He’s just a sweetheart. I have a miniature dachshund. Yeah.
Janel Greig (06:29):
Very good. Very good. What’s your dog’s name?
Alicia Bennett (06:33):
Rocky.
Janel Greig (06:34):
Rocky.
Dr. Matt Jones (06:35):
Now is that, wait, what? Is that from the Rocky movie series, or no? Or Rocky and Bullwinkle?
Alicia Bennett (06:41):
No, he has black and white spottle, like spotted. And so we thought he’d kind of look like a rock.
Dr. Matt Jones (06:47):
Okay.
Alicia Bennett (06:47):
When we got him. They’re so little when they’re puppies.
Dr. Matt Jones (06:51):
Thanks, Alicia, for that. Great job on the speed round. And I just really appreciate you engaging in it and being vulnerable enough to say, “Man, I did not grow up in an environment where we took spiritual growth seriously and you guys have made an intentional shift.” And I just want people to know, first of all, there is hope in the midst of that. I interact with a lot of college students who didn’t grow up in good homes and also a lot of folks that are young couples, didn’t grow up. And it is possible to make that change even though you feel ill-equipped.
And so what helped you overcome that feeling of being ill-equipped? But then also saying, “All right. Oh, how are we as a couple going to engage in this and continue in this?” Because that sets up or reinforces something you were saying about the importance of your kid being able to ask questions.
Alicia Bennett (07:43):
Yeah. Yeah. I was not one of those little girls that dreamed of being a mom either. And so when we got pregnant with our first, I was petrified, if I’m honest. And I think just acknowledging that I was really afraid that I didn’t feel like I knew what I was doing. And I was a very, I mean, what’s the right word?
I grew up doing well in school and accomplishing all the things and not really struggling a ton in the academic areas and just relational areas and places, but I just felt completely over my head when it came to now suddenly having to take care of this new one. So I think, honestly, first, humbly recognizing that you don’t know what you’re doing is a great place to start. But then I just dug in. I went back to my academic days and dug in and read everything I could get my hands on.
(08:48):
So I was always reading a parenting book, probably multiple parenting books. I mean, the stacks of parenting books that I have in my library are dense. And I have a handful that I recommend and a handful that I don’t, but I learned and really, not only did I just read a lot. Then my husband and I would go on a walk and we would talk about it because he’s not as much of a reader and plus he had a full-time job. So it’s harder for him to read it, but we would then discuss everything that I was thinking about, and we still do this.
“All right, what are you thinking about this next phase? Okay, we’ve got a couple more years with our oldest. What are some important things that we want to make sure he experiences, he learns?” In fact, several years ago, one of my favorite teenage books is Feeding the Mouth that Bites You.
(09:39):
And we read that together. We actually both read that, and then we developed what we call a learn before they leave plan. So some very key areas for us that we wanted our teens, eventually all of them, but to learn, to experience and to believe, to hold true to that once they left our house.
(10:08):
It’s kind of like the example, this is an example I give often. I would rather my teenager go into debt as a 15 year old and learn how to get out of debt and learn how to save and learn how to manage money while he’s in my house than drop him off at college and good luck with that buddy and him not know what to do when a money management issue comes up.
So our learn before you leave plan covers everything from money management, vehicle maintenance, to theological apologetic topics we want to make sure we have with them. So technology spans the breath. Yeah. I’m making him learn how to cook. Every summer he has to start learning new things, how to cook because I’m like, you’re going to be capable in all of these key areas, and yeah.
Dr. Matt Jones (10:56):
That’s a good one. The only thing is he may not be as motivated to get married on that one.
Janel Greig (11:01):
He has the skills.
Dr. Matt Jones (11:03):
Just a heads up.
Alicia Bennett (11:04):
That’s funny. That’s funny. I hadn’t thought about that.
Dr. Matt Jones (11:08):
Don’t teach him to cook too well. There you go. Teach him to cook. Because our son has learned how to cook also and he’s actually pretty good at it.
Alicia Bennett (11:17):
Well, I have to admit that on my husband’s side of the family, a lot of the husbands, my husband is actually one of four boys too. His dad does most of the cooking and multiple of his brothers do most of the cooking in their family.
Dr. Matt Jones (11:30):
And my dad, my dad’s the same way. He does most of the cooking now. Oh, well, I just thought I’d throw that out there because, what’s that old? The quickest way to a guy is through his stomach. So I don’t know. Have you heard that, Janel?
Janel Greig (11:43):
Oh, absolutely. I think it’s true.
Dr. Matt Jones (11:46):
Okay. All right.
Janel Greig (11:48):
No, that’s great. It’s that planned emancipation, Alicia, right? And I love that you guys have put your own spin on it. My kids in our house, we’ve worked through that actually fairly recently. And sometimes my response when they ask a question is planned emancipation and they’re like, oh, and they know they have to shift and work through something. But no, that’s great.
One of the things, when parents are looking at leaning towards controlling the actual behavior of a kid rather than guiding their faith, often that’s rooted in fear. And I think Paul David Tripp does a beautiful job of drawing this out, the idols of our hearts. Sometimes our kids become those idols of our hearts.
But what kind of fears have you seen parents? I mean, you’ve shared yours, which I think I appreciate your transparency and that’s important for people to hear. They’re not alone in this, but what kind of fears have you seen parents wrestle with and how have those fears shaped the way that they actually interact with their kids?
Alicia Bennett (12:44):
Sure. Honestly, I think that all of our fears come back down to one of those three lies that we’re wrestling with. And so whether it’s a fear of our kids misbehaving in public or shaming us or walking away from the faith, a moral failure, right, not graduating high school, all of those outside external behavioral things. Our fear in it comes from what you said.
There’s an idol there, there’s a lack of truth in something that we believe about our kids or ourselves that is feeding that fear. And so leaning in and allowing yourself to get curious about why am I reacting this way? Why am I so afraid of this? Leaning in, allowing yourself to lean into that feeling and get to the root so that the Lord can work on that with you. Yeah. Yeah.
Dr. Matt Jones (13:42):
For me, sometimes that is simply, I am finding my identity in my child.
Janel Greig (13:46):
Yes.
Dr. Matt Jones (13:47):
Yes. And that for me simplifies some of the thinking in terms of, wait a minute, in this moment, am I getting my significance from my kid? And if so, that first of all is hugely problematic. Second of all, that should point me to want to rely on Christ again. But third of all, that says, wait a minute, I may be putting more investment in who my child is rather than God and then my wife and then my child comes much later. So that’s been really interesting for me to recognize it a couple times in my life. Did you have a follow-up on that, Janel? Or are you good?
Janel Greig (14:23):
Yeah, no, I think that was great. Thank you.
Dr. Matt Jones (14:25):
Okay, cool. So Alicia, you’ve done great today and I really appreciate some of the practical things you’ve given. I really love question at night. Every night we get a question and my oldest daughter would’ve just been, “Can I stay up later?” Yes.That’s what she would’ve said every time. I’m really not that interested, dad. Just let me stay up later. But I really do think that’s a cool idea.
And so do you have any other practical steps that parents can take, maybe even this week, beyond the question one, to start raising kids who truly know what they believe like Daniel, like Esther? And then of course, just kind of letting go of control and trusting God to lead their hearts. Any additional thoughts there?
Alicia Bennett (15:08):
I think that really comes down to having a long-term view of parenting. I think one of my favorite quotes that I heard from one of those parenting books way back was like, “Have the long-term view in mind, have the end in mind when you begin.” And so I like to pull back the lens for parents and help them to dream about the end, if you will.
Not that parenting ever really ends, but when you’ve launched on 18, 19, somewhere around that age, what qualities, what characteristics, what experiences, what beliefs, what skills do you want your kids to have at that point when they are legally an adult, on their own, whatever that looks like for you, and then back it up. I think it’s just really helpful for parents to have that big picture. Not that that is a goal that they have to accomplish, but it does help inform the small habits and decisions that you’re making today.
(16:07):
I think you can’t go wrong with that, right? And then you just have to persist. Galatians 6:9, don’t grow weary and doing good for it will produce a harvest if we don’t give up. So those small steps that we take compound over time and they grow on each other. So having that long-term lens, honestly, I feel like is the most advantageous parenting advice that anyone can receive.
If that’s the only thing you take away from this podcast today, having the long-term view will help you to not react in the moment and help you to have the picture to lean in when your kids are having those challenging behavioral moments that you do need to deal with. It’s not that you’re ignoring them, but with having that big picture in mind, you approach them differently.
Dr. Matt Jones (16:56):
Yeah. And to reinforce that from Hebrews chapter 12, it says, “Consider Jesus who endured from sinners such hostility against himself so that you may not grow weary and faint hearted.” And Christ endured. And so if he did it through the power of the Holy Spirit, guess what? We can do it too because we have that same Holy Spirit.
So Alicia, thank you for sharing your insights with us today. Thank you for creating mobilizermom.com. That’s mobilizermom.com. Check it out. I was looking at it this week and she has a great motivation for why she started it there and just the incredible opportunity to raise kids who truly know what they believe and why. Boy, thanks for having that long-term view and reminding us of that importance today. So hearing your perspective on guiding faith and releasing control and trusting God to produce Daniels and Esthers has been really, really encouraging.
(17:53):
So it’s not about perfection, parents, or controlling every moment. It’s about creating space for your kids to wrestle with faith, asking thoughtful questions, modeling trust in God in your own life. And these small everyday moments can help us point to that long-term goal. So thank you all for listening to the Upside Down Parenting Podcast. We’ll see you next time as we continue exploring how to raise kids who love God, think deeply and stand strong in today’s culture. God bless. Thank you for your time.